Another snow job

March Madness II: Or, as we refer to it in these parts, the weather report.

I was minding my own business Sunday night - after a weekend that seemed to go by in a heartbeat - when I made the fatal mistake of flipping on the TV. It’s a problem for me. I have trouble divorcing myself from the news. That’s why I spend an inordinate amount of time staring at my laptop or phone over the weekend. I figured I’d catch the 6 o’clock news for the latest headlines.

Big mistake.

I can tell you why in one word: Weather.

Oddly enough, I had already written on this topic for my Monday print column. I am past being amused at the way the local TV stations handle the weather.

So you can imagine I was not especially happy to hear that we’re getting one final shot of winter today before spring arrives on Wednesday. I had not heard anything about snow before this. I was intrigued, so I actually waited for the lovely woman doing the weekend weather to offer some more details.

I’m still waiting.

If I heard her correctly and can decipher all the gobbledygook and weather jargon, there is a chance of some snow west and north of here. And even if it does it’s not going to amount to anything. It’s too late in the season. But that didn’t stop her from letting us know there was a chance of several inches accumulating. Of course, that will only happen if you live in the Poconos.

Ah, yes, the ever-expanding northern and western suburbs. Around here? Probably not so much. It’s going to be wet, cold and miserable. It may even snow a bit, just as it did Saturday afternoon when for a while I was driving in a blizzard that lasted about 10 minutes. Nothing accumulated on the roads. The sidewalk was a bit slick.

Spring can’t get here soon enough. Then I suppose they can start screaming about drought conditions.

I think we’ll survive. So long as we don’t turn on the TV.

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