The newsroom should be a bit more tranquil place for the next 40 days.
Yes, I will once again don sack cloth and ashes and observe my very own Lenten sacrifice. I am once again swearing off swearing. That's right. No more blue streaks emanating from the editor's office. I'm not proud of it, but the truth is I can cuss with the best of them. Of course, my favorite is a particular four-letter word that is among the most versatile in the English language. No more F-Bombs.
My crusade likely will be a tad more challenging this year. That's because my colorful vocabulary is not the only thing undergoing some changes for the next 40 days. My diet will, as well.
In the past, I have often given up alcohol for Lent. I'm disturbed, not insane. That's not happening this year. I also dabbled with the notion of actually trying to give up coffee, but I didn't think we needed the spectacle of the editor on the roof of the newspaper threatening to take hostages.
This one was inspired by my long-suffering wife. She fears for my health. And to that end, she has encouraged me to change my eating habits, one in particular.
I think it's time for a confession.
I'm a potato chip junkie.
My co-workers likely will be somewhat dubious about this claim. Most of them wonder if I ever eat anything, aside from my daily banana ritual at lunch.
It's true, I don't really eat very much when I'm in the office. I can't tell you the last time I've actually taken a lunch break, sat down at a table, and ate what most people consider a normal part of their day - lunch.
Instead I usually try to wolf something down at my desk while banging away on the keyboard.
The result is I'm usually fairly ravenous when I get home. This is where 'Mr. Chips' gets involved. My normal routine is to walk in the house and make a beeline for the drawer where we keep the snacks.
I immediately grab the bag of Herr's potato chips (is there really any other kind?) and start stuffing them in my face. Often this happens even before I take off my coat.
My wife has been reminding me for months this is not an especially healthy lifestyle (Is there anything about the newspaper racket that is?).
I blame my boyhood pal, Ed Herr. Yes, I went to school and claim as a friend that giant face that appears on all the billboards hawking Herr's snack products.
So here is my challenge. For Lent this year, no more chips. In fact, I'm going to try to swear off the salty snacks altogether - pretzels, Lance crackers, Pepperidge Goldfish, tortilla chips (with salsa, of course).
Pass the carrots and celery sticks.
Wish me luck. I already feel like cursing a blue streak.
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