One of the reasons I am still at this racket after more than three decades is because of the sheer joy I take from one of the tasks I perform every day.
They are called headlines.
They are the bane of every reporter who has to live with the consequences, who deal with irate readers who say the headline on their story is inaccurate. They usually aren't exactly understanding when the frazzled reporter informs them that they didn't write the headline.
That task is left for editors, people like me.
Even after 33 years in the business, there is still nothing quite like a great headline, and in particular seeing it scream off the front of a tab page.
The business I work in is changing. Much of our emphasis is now on delivering information online. There is not nearly the emphasis on creative headlines online as there are in our traditional print world. In fact, much of what we have done for years in print does not work online. Trust me. It has to do with something called SEO and how people search for information. I know, it's a buzzkill.
I am pondering this topic today because of a man named Vincent Musetto.
I know, you probably have no idea who he is.
I do. He's a kindred spirit.
Musetto is the man who wrote one of the most famous headlines (or heds as we refer to them in the biz) ever penned.
It appeared on the front page of the New York Post, which is famous for its slammer Page One "Woods," or what we at the Daily Times refer to as our Black Line. It's our lead story, because of the amount of black ink we used to use to print it.
Musetto crafted the following gem on a story about a strip bar owner who had been shot and beheaded.
"Headless Body in Topless Bar."
It doesn't get much better than that.
Every time I see that headline, it gets me to thinking about some of the heds I've written over the years.
One of my best was actually not even a word or a sentence. It appeared the morning after Pennsylvania executed a man for the first time in several decades. My front page offering:
R.I.Pa.
I still like that one.
But without question the best hedline I've ever written is also one that never appeared in the Daily Times.
It was for a story about John and Lorena Bobbitt. If you don't know why they are famous, Google them. It will become pretty obvious.
A year or so after their moment of fame, John Bobbitt was interviewed. He said he had moved past the incident and held no ill will toward his ex-wife.
My idea for a hedline?
An overline that said, John to Lorena:
And for the lead hed?
NO HARD FEELINGS.
It never appeared in the paper. But the more you think about it, the more it works on a lot of levels.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a front page to start working on for tomorrow.
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