I have been reminded in the last two days of just how fragile life is, how the seemingly most innocuous encounter can quickly spiral out of control.
One happened at work; one while I was driving over the weekend.
Maybe someone can explain to me why Joe Iavarone is dead today.
The popular, longtime coach and teacher in the Garnet Valley School District was fatally shot by a neighbor after some kind of dispute, according to police.
What exactly went down between Iavarone and his neighbor John Ballas in the parking lot of their condo complex in Chester Heights is not quite clear. But it certainly sounds like the kind of mundane arguments we all over at one time or another with neighbors.
But it rarely ever costs a person their life.
It did about 3:30 a.m. Monday, when the skirmish and raised voices between Iavarone and Ballas ended in gunfire. Now two lives have been altered forever. Family and friends, including the Garnet Valley School District community, are mourning Iavarone. Ballas is in jail, held without bail on murder charges.
It's a lesson in the fragility of life that was driving home to me - while I was driving - Monday.
My wife and I had paid a Memorial Day visit to the cemetery where her mom and dad are buried. We were headed home when, again, a seemingly mundane incident had the potential to be something more.
A confession here. I have a tendency to be an aggressive driver. Just ask my wife. I think it comes from the fact that I drive to work every morning in the pre-dawn darkness, when I for the most part have the road to myself.
It's a bit of a different story at mid-day, when you are sharing the road with everyone else on a holiday when they are no doubt trying to get somewhere.
At any rate, we were almost home when we were making our way up a long, step hill on a road not far from our house. The houses on this road sit on both sides at the end of long, steep inclines. I travel on this road going to work every day, and again every night. I have often thought about what it must be like to have to traverse those hills all the time, especially in winter in dealing with snow. The driveways are so steep that in winter many of the residents actually park their cars at the bottom of the hill.
We were cruising up the road - likely faster than I should have been - when I noticed the car that was backing down one of these driveways.
I was taken aback when instead of stopping at the bottom of the drive, the guy backed out right in front of me. OK, I can deal with that. But instead of backing over to the far right lane - out of my way - he sort of straddled the line. I kept on moving, deciding I had enough room to squeeze by on the left.
This apparently set him off. He proceeded to move forward - not over into his right lane - but right at me. He was glaring at me and we locked eyes as he passed by seemingly within inches of my car.
I thought about stopping. Then I decided better of it.
I've covered too many stories of these kinds of incidents that can spiral out of control too easily.
Maybe I was wrong for not just stopping and letting the guy back out. But he was crossing my lane. I clearly had the right of way.
But I decided - for once - to use a little caution.
I would think the families and loved ones of Joe Iavarone and John Ballas would understand.
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